Giving

Problems often tend to end up in blaming games – whose fault was this and that?

Problems are analyzed, but it really doesn’t help much. Instead of working with problems, turn them into goals! Goals are meant to be reached, and it is far more motivating for people.

This means that in feedback you should talk about goals and objectives instead of problems.

Often it is needed to deliver criticism. When people act in ways that we find harmful, we must be able to tell them about it. Unfortunately, there’s always the risk that feedback won’t be received. However, there are easy principles to make feedback more constructive.

Principles of constructive feedback

ACTION

If there’s something about another person you don’t like, think about how they, in your opinion, do act in wrong way.

 It is easier to change behavior than characteristics or attitudes. Practical examples make it also easier to see the unconscious behavior. Sometimes we are not aware about our actions!
↓

FEELING

Explain how the behavior affects you, how does it make you feel.

Focus on relevant things. If person’s behavior doesn’t affect you, it’s not worth to give feedback about. For the one getting the feedback it is easier to understand the meaning of the feedback if the reasoning behind is explained.
↓

RESULT

Explain what does the behavior cause.

Again, this helps you to focus on relevant issues. People may cause strong feelings in you, but does it have consequences, or are you just annoyed? If it has an affect on the atmosphere, working environment, other’s behavior etc., feedback is relevant.
↓

REFLECTION

Reacting to feedback comes from the person receiving it. Reserve time for reflection.

Once feedback has been received it’s important to have time to reflect on it and decide actions accordingly. It’s important to realize that the corrective action comes from the person receiving the feedback, not from the person giving it.
↓

SUPPORT

The person receiving feedback can ask for support.

To make the development of more constructive behavior easier the person receiving the feedback can ask the others to help him/her in changing the behavior.

Criticism becomes constructive feedback, when your attitude is as follows:

  • In essence people try to change their behavior, if they understand what are the effects of their behavior and what they are expected.
  • People don’t act wrong because they are like that (e.g. stupid, selfish, lazy, mean…) but because they don’t know how to, understand or remember to act in a better way.
  • There’s a huge difference how the feedback is delivered: constructive helps to change; hurtful feedback just makes things worse.
  • People are mostly aware what they do poorly or wrong, but they don’t know how do to it right.
  • People often find themselves new & better ways to act, if they are just given a chance.
LoadingAktualisiere...